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30 July 2006

Comments

Miz BoheMia

I AM FIRST! WOOH TO DA HOOH!

Such wise words and the greatest lesson in life for me... in my darkest moments I remember being paralyzed, on the floor, fresh off a panic attack and sobbing to the Loverboy that I did not know how to live and that my life was ruled by fear... it was and I didn't know how to live to the fullest extent and it has taken time, much patience and much breathing (and much help and loving guidance from said amazing Loverboy!) to take those baby steps away from that! I still have a long way to go but jumping off those cliffs becomes easier with time and practice, wouldn't you say? And well, having someone there who will jump with you does soften that fear!

You do have a knack with choosing these quotes dear Neva! Thank you for the amazing email back! I LOVED it and just LOVE you! I will respond to it in the morning for sure as now a whimpering boy calls (fingers crossed for much zzzzz's!)...

Have a beautiful remainder of the day and sleep tight my dearest friend! Love always and forever!

Me... your loyal stalker! ;-)

joel

So true and so hard to achieve. Having no fear means divorcing yourself from the outcome...accepting life's results as perfect regardless. Would like to get there someday. Love you...have I taken a shower yet? Have I fed the pups yet? Is this stupid game over yet? no, no and no.

schnoodlepooh

Wow. That's a tough one.

"Depend on no one" - well that works for me - there's no one in my life that I can depend on. I would never put that kind of burden on the dogs, but I do appreciate their love.

I can't reject help, because there is no help to reject. Does that count?

And let's just say that I am freed - freed of what? Freed of worrying about selling my townhouse? Freed of paying two mortgages? Freed of all my earthly possessions when it goes to foreclosure? I'm having a bit of trouble being freed of the roof over my head, my warm bed, etc. Of course, thanks to two mortgages, I've been freed of most of the money in my bank account. Now that's a kind of freedom that I can live without! But I still have to worry. I have to hang on to my worrying...

tanlucypez

True. But impossible to achieve. Still worth trying for.

Sar

What a perfect picture to accompany that very inspiring (if not as easily attainable as I'd like) quote.

Jenna

I'm rejecting help? Why would I do that? I so can't reach the high shelf anywhere. So if there's someone taller than me I'm not going to hop onto the counter. I'll say "Babe, can you help me? I need that thingamajig."

Oh wait...it was about fear. Well...drugs help me fly. Am I going to reject drugs or will I run up and down the aisle like Marge Simpson going "let me off, let me off, let me off" or screaming "WE'RE GOING TO DIE A FIERY DEATH!!!" when we hit turbulence. No, drugs help with that fear. Or booze. That works to.

So I guess I'll never be enlightened.

Oh well. That doesn't surprise me at all ;)

neva

schnoodlepooh: boy...that's a tough one. i don't think this quote is meant to discourage us from finding help when we need it, it's more about facing down our fears. sort of a "what's the worse that can happen?" thing, ya know? what i've learned over the years is that fear is at the root of all that ails us. it drives our behavior, and causes us to make a lot of mistakes along the way. (chose the wrong partner rather than risk being alone, for instance. take the shitty job in lieu of pursuing the one you really want) life is supposed to be a journey, and on the journey we're supposed to take risks, fully confident that even if what we WANT to happen doesn't, what's supposed to happen will.

i think we sometimes want to hyperfocus on all the shitty things going on, which only helps to create more shitty energy, which keeps the shit flying around all the longer. there is a FABULOUS book i think you'd really love, called "Excuse Me, Your Life is Waiting" by an amazing woman named Lynn Grabhorn that deals with the idea of "inviting" positives into our lives. she's really funny and it's a very entertaining read...(joel and i both adored it). you have so much going for yourself... i believe with all my heart that all the good things you desire/deserve are coming your way. (i really do) xoxox

TLP: oh yeah... it's hard to chase out our fears, isn't it? but i've been working on it, and so far, everything i've stopped hyperfocusing on in a negative way has sort of taken care of itself. i guess Joel's right, too, because acceptance of any and all outcomes as "perfect" makes everything okay (in a sense). what have i learned? how does this help me down the road? these are the things i try to look at, and when i do, i usually find my answers!

so happy to see you here, byt the way, and i loveloveloved your new post!! xoxox

Sar: thank you! it took me awhile to find this picture, because it was the one i wanted to use with this quote! yep, this is hard stuff. good stuff, but hard! xoxo

Jenna: help? drugs? booze? Marge Simpson?? uh, which quote are we talking about again?? (hee hee) actually, you already know this, but most of the time, the thoughts we have about how this is gonna go or what that person is gonna say is *much* worse than what really happens. i mean, don't we all tend to take some things too freaking seriously?? yes. yes we do. fear is an irrational emotion that tends to drive our behaviors. i think the buddha is just telling us to stop being so paralyzed with fear that we forget to live.

of course, i could be wrong. maybe he's just saying it's okay to ride the rollercoaster by yourself once in awhile! woo-hoo! xoxo

actonbell

I agree that the ultimate goal is contentment, and truly enjoying company, instead of NEEDING them for help is a wonderful thing!

Good quote, great pic:)

actonbell

Rabbit, rabbit!

dddragon

Rabbit Rabbit!!

LisaBinDaCity

Awww what a cutie pie puppy! And great quote, I LOVE it.

Thanks for visiting my blog - I'll be back!!!

good girl

This is a tough one, Puppytoes :-( It's a worthy goal to endeavour towards, to have no fear. While fear is an intangible state of mind, the things fear is tied to are often too tangible, things that need tending to bravely, things that demand we dig deep, go better than we're willing to go.

Never fear what will become of you. Now this I resonate with more. BUT it' still hard not to worry. My future? My job? My money? What will they think/do? How shall I respond? etc all these tiny split-second decisions open a new path, such that some might tarry a little longer, trying to work out what might happen, trying to negotiate through shadows and dragons to come to a deep breath that might push us forward, even if just a little.

Working on it, Puppytoes. Workign on it :-)

GG xo

Miz BoheMia

GG, it boils down to this (courtesy of His Holiness the Dalai Lama... not my original thought! Let it be noted for the record!)...

If something can be remedied, is under your control, then you will see to it that it gets done and works right, no? So why worry then?

And if something cannot be helped, there is nothing you can do to change things, then why worry? It is what it is and you know that were it otherwise you would do your best, no? And so you move on...

Sounds simple but hard nevertheless, especially for us Western minds with myriad attachments and deep rooted fears! Oh my!

FirstNations

worked for Nike.

i don't think i'm going to be enlightened any time soon, but i will have comfortable feet.

good girl

Oh MizB, you are mostest wisest funkifiedest ;-) I suppose it's a little bit like the Serenity Prayer:

"..serenity to accept the things I cannot change//courage to change the things I can//and the wisdom to see the difference.."

Phew! I an be most wise too ;-)

GG

neva

actonbell: i'm with you, girlfriend, i'd much rather have company because i want it and not because i need it!

and Rabbit, Rabbit! to you, too!! xox

dddragon: Rabbit, Rabbit! to you, Miss Civic-Minded-Busiest-Girl-on-the-Planet-and-i-can't-believe-you-had-time-to-come-by-but-i'm-soooo-glad-you-did!! and thanks!! xox

Lisa-Bin-Da-City: what a treat to see you here! thank you... and i hope you do come back! xox

GG: i think the point is to not worry needlessly about things you have no control over... we are all so adept at creating more drama in our lives than we need and/or really want. sometimes life is hard because we make it that way. in other words, those shadows and dragons are only as big and as scary as we allow them to be.

i know you've been on quite a journey yourself, but i have faith you'll come through it all in winning form! you're just too spunky and full of life not to! xox

Miz B: oh how i envy your time with the Dalai lama! and of course you (and he) are completely right. it IS simple and hard at the same time! hardhardhard.

it is what it is. that's what i always say, too... and i, for one, believe it! no matter what happens, it's perfect. (tho' i'm guessing the problems you've been having with your teeth seem like something else... there must be a lesson in there, somewhere... wonder what it is?) thank you for your enlightening and beautiful words of wisdom, my dear dear friend! xox

First Nation: "no fear"? or "just do it"? either way, i'm with ya... as long as we're on this stinkin' journey, may as well have happy feet! not only are you brilliant, you are wise. oh, and you know a lot about art. damned impressive, my friend, damned impressive!! xox

neva

GG: d'oh! guess you popped in while i was writing that comment. (i just saw it)

the serenity prayer? one of my ALL TIME FAVORITES! the words are so beautiful, and the concept so comforting... i can't tell you how many times i'll just stop and say it when i'm feeling overwhelmed. it's a perfect reminder of how to keep your perspective. so glad you brought it up! thanks!! (and thanks for stopping back by!!) truly lovely. xoxo

Miz BoheMia

Oh no! I never have had the pleasure to meet him! Those were simply his words! Though we are close to a Rinpoche, cousin of my freind the Lama, who is a personal student of the Dalai Lama!

As for the teeth, I am calmer this morning and getting ready to just show up there and see what happened this time! The lesson? I have an idea but would be too long for here although I did nee to pop in to blow you, dear Neva a beso! Hope you have a beautiful evening!

Mom101

This is awesome - and very timely. Arianna Huffington, who was the keynote this weekend (at the conference that will not be named) was plugging her book on fearlessless, and that ended up as the topic of the discussion that followed. While her perspective was interesting, I think the Buddha's is more so.

g

Okay now that I've got my blogroll up and running, I'm ready to reject all help! I thought I commented here already, but apparently not. These quotes are so wise, they really do refresh my outlook weekly. The truth is if you tear it all apart at the end of the day - rely on yourself. I hope I am teaching my children this very important lesson (except I can't deal with dirty clothes lying about and well...it's a work in progress).

good girl

I LOVE LOVE the Serenity Prayer. Such a tiny simple verse and it encompasses everything. You're absolutely right. It's comforting and brings one back to centre again when things get overwhelming. I've got it on my laptop just to have a wee peep every now and again.

GG xox

Miz BoheMia

*sniff* Both Joel and I were overlooked! OVERLOOKED! Look up above! Well, at least I was in good company while in timeout...

;-) Bohemians cannot pass up a chance to be cheeky you see! Ooooweee!

Jenna

OOooh. Hm. I knew I missed the path to enlightment. I took the left path and well...that's a lot more...um...unenlightened. I could use a flashlight actually.

neva

Miz B: actually, i knew that... what i should have said is how i envy your time with the monks/lamas (not to be confused with llamas, right?)... you have walked with many wise people in your life, despite your youth!

i am very relieved to know your teeth are in a better condition than they were last night. i believe one of the first things we'll do when we get you back to the states is get you in to see a proper dentist!! you can't be going through the rest of your life fearing (there's that word again) biting into foods you love!! yeesh! that would just suck. much much love to you, beautiful BoheMian!! xox

Mom-101: thank you so much! and, speaking of awesome (i'm the proverbial broken record here) may i just say how much i enjoyed your posts about the convention (which shall remain nameless)?? you are a fearless--not to mention phenomenal writer, and one i happen to admire greatly! xox

g: good luck with the dirty clothes! as one who claims on a regular basis "that's it, from now on you guys will do your own freaking laundry" and then proceeds to stay up late doing aforementioned freaking laundry, i know your pain. teach 'em now, while they're still young enough to fear you. xox

GG: i can't think of a better way to start a day than to do so armed with that "prayer". actually, it's more than a prayer, because it encompasses a philosophy for maintaining our perspective, right? right! not only are you lovely/spunky/sassy... you're jus' plain smart! (of course, i already knew this) xox

Miz B: i know! honestly? i thought i wrote a separate comment to you and joel when i did that, but i guess it was on the other post. what can i say? i'm a maroon! lo siento, amiga...

as for you FIRST COMMENT?? i know what you mean about that fear. it's amazing how it takes hold of us, and dictates our decisions (or non-decisions). true freedom comes from letting go of it. a simple concept, to be sure, but oh-so-hard to do!

this quote actually spoke to me on a few different levels. not just for myself, but for some of my beloved family members, too. (my son, for one) i'm glad you liked it, and i thank you again for providing your own wonderful insight! xox

Jenna: two paths diverged in the wood... and you took the one that was... unenlightened? i think not, girlfriend! i just think you took the one that looked like it would be a bit more fun, for now. fear not (heh heh) we're organizing a search party and i promise, we'll find you and drag you back to the freaking enlightened path, whether you like it or not! (oh. guess that's not how it's supposed to work, is it?) xox

HONEY: forgive me? i can't believe i didn't comment on your comment. tho' you never commented on the fact that i didn't comment, so how the hell was i to know?? what's that? no comment? sigh. i was afraid you'd say that!

thank you for teaching me every day about love and why fear has no place in our lives. i love you! xoxox

Deana

I am betting that is really a hard thing to do but it makes alot of sense!

I love your beautiful pictures as always!

weirsdo

The philosopher Dr. Weirsdo and I like, Emmanuel Levinas, believes that the sort of transcendent freedom recommended by Buddha is impossible, and that the way we truly achieve transcendence (including freedom from fear) when we are overwhelmed with ethical feelings toward others. Of course, that doesn't mean we can't be free from hyperfocus.

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