puppytoes

dalai bobo's...

~thought for the week~

"The whole secret of existence is to have no fear. Never fear what will become of you, depend on no one. Only the moment you reject all help are you freed."

~Buddha~

new phone

i keep thinking i'll do a new post, but then i don't. i don't know why i don't, i just don't. maybe it's because i'm spending too much time reading everyone else's blogs and/or hanging out HERE. maybe it's because i've been spending too much time taking naps and/or frolicking in the front yard (it's hot, but we frolic, oh how we frolic. and then, i nap). and maybe it's because i've been spending too much time and/or having too much fun watching mommy (bespeckled in Poindexteresque reading glasses, no less) try to program/learn how to use her fancy-schmancy new cell phone, a Samsung SCH-a930 with picture/movies and/or text messaging/internet access/speaker phone/voice activated calling/kitchen sink/shoe horn/E-911 capability/and Bluetooth Wireless Technology. doesn't that all sound special? i'm sure it does, but what difference does it make if you have no idea how to use these things?

so many bells and/or whistles. so little time in which to learn how to use 'em all. can you hear me now? no? sigh. maybe you would, if mommy could just figure out how to turn her stupid fancy-schmancy cell phone on. (of course, when you have to press the "end" button in order to do that, is it any wonder she gets confused?)

"I have not failed. I've just found 10, 000 ways that won't work." ~ Thomas Edison

dalai bobo's...

~thought for the week~

"In a controversy, the instant we feel anger we have already ceased striving for the truth, and have begun striving for ourselves." ~Buddha

question...

is it just me? or is Fuzzy Butt (resident 18 year-old cat/curmudgeon)...

lookin' a whole hell of a lot like Bill the Cat these days?

what? if i felt like writing something more creative, i'd write something more creative. yeesh. trust me, if that happens any time soon, you'll be the FIRST to know.

"Ack!" ~ Bill the Cat (Bloom County)

dalai bobo's...

~thought for the week~

"Let the wise guard their thoughts, which are difficult to perceive, extrememly subtle, and wander at will. Thought which is well guarded is the bearer of happiness." ~ Buddha

can we chat?

Go ahead. ask me what the hell i was thinking when i sent that email to Doug. the email in which i volunteered my humble services to do a "guest post". i won't be able to give you any kind of answer, but ask me anyway. no? why the hell not? le chat... er... cat got yer tongue? okay...you big baby, i'll tell you why. because sometimes i do things without fully thinking them through. sometimes these things work out nicely. sometimes, they do not. the jury's out on this one, but, for the sake of argument, let's just say it's worked out. and let's say that because to say anything else will piss me off. i'm a wreck, so humor me, won't you? trust me, it'll go much easier on us both if you do.

naturally, you'd think i'd want to impress any potential visitors today  with  my wit and/or wisdom, perhaps by offering up some clever anecdote about this, that, or the other. but you'd be wrong. i have no anecdotes about this. certainly not about that. and i sure as hell have nothing to say about the other. has no one noticed the lack of verbiage around here of late? did you NOT hear me the other day when i told you i was using up what few ideas i had with what was left of my mind over HERE? what's the problem? is my mouth moving and is nothing coming out again? (thanks for reminding me of that, oh Lady of the Lampshade... hope you liked the way i just snatched it out from under you like a cheap Persian Rug, and made it my own)

anyway, the deed is done. and, in truth, the process was not nearly as horrifying as i thought it might be. i mean, it was a little unnerving to have to fill out all those forms (did he really need to know my mother's maiden name? or how much i weigh? or how well i did on my SATs?). but it turns out that Doug (if that's his real name) is a kind and generous fellow. for a curmudgeon. the only time i found myself wondering what i'd gotten myself into was when he finally emailed the word i was to define, and, for a second there, i thought it was "qulex". as you might imagine, i shit a brick freaked out was mildly upset, until i realized that wasn't the word at all, but some spam that found its way into the "in" box just above the actual email from Doug. for, of course, the word he'd sent was "chat".

by the way, in case anyone's wondering, the first thing that popped into my fragile little mind when i saw the word "chat" was... why? why is this my word? is it because i'm an artful conversationalist? because, if that were the case, wouldn't my word be more artful? conversational? no. that can't be it. then i walked away from the computer and scratched my head. but still, it nagged at me. what did this mean? how should i take it? does he really want me to talk about ... talkishness? eventually i got tired of pondering, and, as i curled up to take a nap, i came to the conclusion that he did. so i did. talk about it, i mean. and, in case you missed the link the FIRST 2 times i listed it, the result of my effort can be found HERE.

now, if i were you, which i'm not, i'd race over there rightthisminute and leave a comment. also, if i were you, which i'm not, i'd say something witty. something clever. in fact, if i were you, which i think we've establised, i am not, i might even try to work in the word "qulex", because the reallyreally smart folks over there won't know what it means (mostly because it's not a word), which means they'll think you're reallyreallyreally smart, and, because you're my friend, they'll think i'm reallyreallyreally smart, too. and, in the end, isn't that what we all want? to be witty and/or clever and/or fool a bunch of reallyreally smart people and/or make me look reallyreally good?

"Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others." ~Groucho Marx

dalai bobo's...

~thought for the week~

"It is better to travel well than to arrive." ~ Buddha

diary of a mad frustrated puppy...

*UPDATE: dear diary, perhaps you were unaware of this, but some people manage to be creative, even when words fail 'em... check out what Shayna did for me HERE!! you can't tell, but i'm blushing. i'd like to THANK Shayna for such a wonderful and lovely gesture...and, as soon as i can figure out what to say, i probably will!!

dear diary: it's finally come to this. i'm using what few ideas i have over HERE, and am left holding an empty bloggy bag on my own site. what's to become of me? how shall i cope? more importantly, how will you cope? i don't know if you know this, but without me, you are nothing more than a collection of empty pages worth little more than a hanging chad in a florida election. oh, i suppose i could learn origami, and fold some of your pages into a paper pond full of swans and tiny boxes, but without opposable thumbs, it's gonna be real hard.

now i'm not saying i'm tossing you out, diary, but on days when i've got nothin' to share, instead of writing, i'm gonna glue in a few pictures of me 'n the boys frolicking in the front yard, and see how that works out. with luck i'll be able to scrape together a few words in the near future... but, if i were you, i wouldn't hold my breath.

"God...sat down for a moment when the dog was finished in order to watch it...and to know that it was good, that nothing was lacking, that it could not have been made better." ~ Ranier Maria Rilke

dalai bobo's...

~ thought for the week ~

"If we could see the miracle of a single flower clearly, our whole life would change."   ~ Buddha

no time.

gosh i wish i had time to blog. that would be swell.

i have quite a few things on my mind right now... but no time to talk about any of 'em. i hate that. i hate that more than... well than just about anything, including Max (tho' he runs a close second, especially right now, when those stink "bombs" he's firing off are causing my eyes to water). sigh. with a little more time, i'd be quite the little blabber mouth. but, what with the stupid painters painting, mommy spending hours on end trying to find something nice to wear to a wedding, and the inordinate amount of time we've both been spending at the Snark Park, well, there's just been no time to spare. still, if i close my eyes, i can almost see the post:

i'd start by chatting a moment or two about the "stolen keys incident" (as it has come to be known). the incident in which boy #2, who is banned from driving any and all cars around here, "borrowed" mommy's BMW X3 in the middle of the night, because, and i quote, "duh, i just wanted to drive around a bit 'cuz i was, uh, bored". "a bit" of driving that used up half a tank of gas. a tank that, if you are to believe the stories, costs mommy $823 every time she fills up.

oh, and i'd make the story really funny by telling the best part, which was how mommy figured out what the little fucker idiot dope boy had done. because she's sharp as a tack, after noticing the seats/mirrors adjusted differently, the radio set to an off-the-wall station, and that aforementioned 1/2 empty tank of gas, it occured to her to ask him, which she did. and he confessed. in fact, he spilled his guts. i mean, the little fucker idiot dope kid may be a thief (sort of), but he's an honest thief. sigh. wouldn't that have had everyone rolling in the aisles? i'm sure.

the other -- and BEST -- part of my post would have been about mommy's hot date with Gina, who writes a blog about something that's supposed to be simple but i simply can't remember what it's called. it's probably a complicated name, otherwise i'm sure it would come to me. doesn't matter, because the important part of the post i don't have time to write is where mommy drove out to Long Island to meet the hilarious/wonderful Gina. and how mommy lurked waited in the lobby for Gina to come and fetch her and saw this very chic, very attractive redhead (redhead? kind of, but darker. richer. auburn? bordeaux? merlot? don't know...) dressed in black walk by, so mommy pretended to be reading the listings on the wall in order to look nonchalant/inconspicuous. and how the woman kind of glanced over at mommy and mommy kind of glanced back and the woman and then they kind of stared at each other and said at the same time "Neva?" "Gina?" and then they laughed and laughed and laughed. and didn't stop laughing for the next three hours. it was, as i like to say, a veritable laugh-fest.

they giggled through the tour of Gina's office, as Gina showed mommy her desk/computer/pictures/Nadine. they chortled while scarfing down their tuna-fish sandwiches. they guffawed when mommy realized she had smeared tuna all over her face. they howled while sipping on lattes/triple-grande-soy-no-whip-mochas and some of it snorted out of mommy's nose. at one point, they laughed so hard mommy almost wet her pants, tho' they didn't laugh about that because mommy didn't want Gina to think ill of her. not on thier first date. and, even tho' Gina made a number of subtle hints about going back to work ("um... i really should be getting back to work or they're gonna fire me" "ya know, maybe we should save some of this conversation for our next meeting" "let go of my leg, you pathetic twerp, and for goddsake get up off the floor!") mommy and Gina stayed out for over 2 1/2 hours.

as the afternoon began to spill into the evening, and it was finally time to go their separate ways, mommy didn't think it was the least bit weird when Gina drove off before mommy could close the door when she was dropped her off at her car. the fact that Gina burned rubber in the process did not phase mommy at all. not even the nice security officer who politely, but firmly, told mommy to leave the premises could sway mommy's belief that she and Gina had been separated at birth (assuming their mother had had twins and carried one of 'em a few years longer than the one she gave birth to that turned out to be mommy) and that they were destined to be NBFF (*new* best-friends forever!). all-in-all, it was a magical day, and i'm quite certain readers would have enjoyed... um... reading about it. alas, 'twas not meant to be.

stupid time. you always seem to run out on me just when i need you most. you know what Groucho Marx says about you, don't ya? "Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana." hahahahahaha! see that, time? see how i go out of my way to humor you? why can't you return the favor once in awhile? huh? speak up. don't just stand there tapping your foot. what's that? you have things to do? places to go? deadlines to push? fine. you know what? screw you. screw you and the crummy 24 hours you rode in on. oh, and don't think for one second that i don't know how stupid that sounds, because i do. i just don't have enough time to figure out how to make it sound better.

**EXTRA! EXTRA!! i'm such a doofus. not sure i know what a doofus is, but if it's a goofy something or other, then, that's me! guess who "won" the lyric contest over at SHAYNA'S?? that's right... me. or mommy. but she can't do anything without me, so i'm taking credit for this, too! the only reasosn i didn't mention it earlier is because i didn't know. but now i do... and so do you! ("do"..."you"...see how good i am with all that rhyming crap? is it any wonder i win these things so handily?? hee hee!)

"I can't complain, but sometimes I still do."  ~Joe Walsh